Feb 2, 2009

The Annoying Feline.


Shut the bathroom door (So she does not open the drawer and steal the ponytail holders)

Clear all cups off the counter (so she does not knock them off and bat them all around the house all night on the hardwood floors)

Shut all the kids bedroom doors (so she does not pounce on their feet and heads in the night...thus waking them up.)

Collect all the little trash cans, put them in my closet, and shut the door....tight. (so she does not knock them all over in the night and pull the stuff out)

No, I no longer have a two year old, this,my friends, is my to do list every single night before I go to bed and every day before I leave the house all because of our one year old cat Kittromney. I thought cats were supposed to be sweet little cuddly things that just sleep all the time. But not Kittromney.

I am very proud of myself because I frequently pull my furniture out and clean behind it. But when I pulled the couch out from the wall when I was painting last week I was not prepared for the sight that met my eyes. See the picture? That was what I found. Kittromney's treasures. I have no idea how she gets her grubby little paws on the milk tops but she adores them. And you and I already know how she gets the kids ponytails. I kept seeing her go under the couch but I had no idea it was her closet.

When I was painting last week I laid plastic drop cloths everywhere because that is what you do when you paint. The first night after I put them down I went to bed and after about 15 minutes heard the cat racing across the plastic so I turned on the light to investigate and the heater vents were blowing up pieces of the plastic and Kittromney was leaping from billow of plastic to billow of plastic in definite "cat glee." So I moved the plastic off of the vents and went back to bed about 15 minutes later I hear Kittromney on the plastic again so I turn on the light and go to investigate and this time she has managed to get under the plastic and has dragged one of her toys with her and is again experiencing "cat glee."

I decided enough was enough. Brian was not around to defend her so I tossed her in the below zero garage.(report me to the pet police...I dare you :) But even "tossing her in the garage" is not as nonchalant as it sounds, you have to trick her. You find one of her favorite toys and throw it bit by bit towards the garage door until she chases the item into the garage and then,and only then,can you again congratulate yourself for being smarter than the cat.

Once you get her in the garage you still have problems, you see she loves to leap up onto the door between the house and the garage and attempt to reach the door handle....could someone explain to her that she has paws? So after I tricked her into the garage I had to barricade the garage side of the door with a pile of boxes then I have to go around the outside of the house and back in. Finally, sweet sleep!!

By morning I heard her claws making the "claws on chalkboard" sound on the door from the garage to the house. It took her most of the night but she had managed to move my barricade.

I confess I dream of Kittromney disappearing without a trace. Tatiana asked me the other day why I did not like animals and I told her I really do like animals when they are outside. I told her I grew up on a hobby farm in a little town north of Seattle and we had lots of animals but they were all outside. Kittromney is not outside :)


Andy said...

I think i would have just left her under the plastic, eventually the vent would have turned off and in the morning you could have disposed of her suffocated little body!

Maddilyn said...

Be nice mommy! We all love Kitt!! And she's really a pretty good kitty. If you just gave our cats a chance they would grow out of doing silly kitten things, but you always "dispose" of them within a year of their arrival.

Brianne said...

I agree...animals belong outside! We've had a cat for 9 years though...they get less frisky the older they get. But after our cat is gone we will NEVER have another pet!

CJ said...

I have 2 beagles and they are my "children" they sleep on the bed with us and even under the covers. I could not imagine my life without pets! While you do have to walk a dog and take them out to do their thing and a cat just goes in a litter box, I do think owning dogs is easier then owning cats. Cats own you, you don't own them. Dogs like to please you and there are many dogs in shelters that need homes that have already been trained too. If you get a puppy then you have to train them and housebreak them and put up with them chewing on everything. Don't get my wrong I LOVE puppies, but not everyone is up for the challenge. Same with getting a kitten they will get into more trouble then an older cat would.

If the kids want the cat but the cat is that much trouble during the night I would make the cat sleep in the kids rooms and make them put up with the cat jumping on them and waking them up. When that happens tell them they are not allowed to come wake up up and complain about it. They want the cat so they have to live with it jumping on their heads and eating their toes. If they want to keep the cat then they can learn to pick up their own things in their room so the cat does not eat them or make noise. I grew up with both a cat and dogs sleeping in my room and normally a fish tank too and had to learn how to keep the cat (who loved water) out of my fish tank. Let them be tired and get their hair chewed on and turned into a rat's nest by the cat and their toes all chewed up and see how long they want to keep the cat. At bedtime just put the cat in their bedroom and close the door and say night night!