Okay, quick run out to your yard, when you get out there frantically start looking under all the leaves of everything you care about in your yard. Did you see anything little and black and silent? Quick, run back in the house and run to your computer and anxiously wait for it to dial up. Then google "black bugs under leaves of plants." Then wade through gross picture after gross picture of every garden pest possible until you discover that the gross garden pest you have is APHIDS. They will try to reassure you by telling you they are the most common garden pest but you will still feel anxious about what to do so immediately google "what to do about aphids?" There are a lot of ideas and if you happen to be a, "solve the problem immediately" kind of person than you will search for the idea that involves what you have on hand.(By the way if you are that kind of person make sure to always have cayenne pepper, and spray bottles on hand so you do not have to call the neighbor :) So the quick fix was 2 TBS of dish soap in 2 quarts of water. Then I went out to the garden and lovingly sprayed every single side of every single leaf of 9 rows of beans, 22 tomato plants, 17 potato plants, 6 squash plants and 4 peppers. Then I boiled 1 teaspoon of cayenne pepper ( don't get it in your eye on accident :) with 4 cloves of garlic for an hour and hopefully made the best poison ever. Mexican anyone? Don't let the picture trick you aphids are small, they come in many colors :), they like to hang out in groups and they produce sticky grossness that ants like.
So my plans for the afternoon changed drastically in the space of a minute and I discovered that I will do whatever it takes to protect my garden even if it means giving up watching Dan In Real Life and sorting through boxes of kids papers.