Aug 28, 2009
Shopping ...With The 13 Year Old.
When you have five sisters it is very hard to make your shopping needs heard. Finally on August 28, 2009, three days before school started, I heard Joe and realized he needed some things. So hard to find time and to get out of the house with just one child when you have seven children. The weather was rainy tonight effectively ruining the other things I needed to do so Joe and Amanda and I headed out to shop. There are a few things that you have to know before you go shopping with a 13 year old boy.
The first thing is you must know how to make farting noises on your arm. Really loud long ones and it is of the utmost importance that you are not embarrassed when you make this noise. You must put your whole heart into it and walk along like doing it is the coolest thing in the world.
The second thing can only happen if it is raining outside. And that is the squeaky noise that wet shoes can make on the floor of JC Penney. You have to twist your foot in a small circle as you walk and do it until the wetness on the bottom of your shoes is gone. And just in case you are wondering it can make that noise all the way through JC Penney and just a few feet beyond the JC Penney entrance out into the mall it will stop.
The third thing is making small farting noises with just your mouth as you walk along. For no other reason than that you can.
Also, if you shop with a thirteen year old boy you need to be able to stand your ground when they want to go into Gamestop. I can do this. I am an expert.
The thing I like about shopping with the thirteen year old is that within 4 minutes he knew exactly what he wanted and there was no settling and no "hemming and hawing" he saw the Adidas Sambas and knew they were the shoes that would make all his dreams come true. So he indulged me and we went to every store in the mall and found the cheapest pair of Adidas Sambas we could. He paid for half of them and we were done. And I have never seen a child so happy about a pair of shoes.
He also knew exactly what kind of shorts he wanted. I love it when people tell me what they like. It makes my life so much easier because I know I can make them happy and I know I am not wasting money. Joe likes cargo shorts with any pattern on them except checks. And he likes any polo shirt.
The funny thing was that after he had made all the loud farting noises with his arm he turns to me and announces that he is embarrassed to be shopping with me. I said, "oh, really." I asked if I looked okay and he looked at me objectively and said, "yes" and I said, "Then why are you embarrassed of me?" Well he could not really answer me. But I am pretty sure I could tell you what embarrassed me about him...oh, yeah I already am :)
He took the picture of his new shoes for the blog and is at this very moment trying to decide which kind of socks he needs to wear with them...no show or ankle?