Aug 22, 2013

Saying Yes When You Meant No.

I have no idea how it happened but we woke up yesterday morning without a kitten and we went to bed with a kitten. Well actually I do know how it happened. Yesterday morning Tatiana, Natalie, and I were walking through the parking lot towards the entrance of Wal Mart and I saw a gathering of people around the entrance and knew without really even knowing that the scene had free kittens written all over it. My two little girls have never seen the "free kitten outside of Wal Mart" thing before but I have, many times. I uttered the words oh no long before the little girls realized what was going on.

Before I go any further let me quickly catch you up....we had owned a cat, Kittromney, for almost six years and when we all went out of town in the end of June Kittromney accidentally got out of the house and we never saw her again. I was so embarrassingly elated at this turn of events.

 And every day since then my Tatiana has asked at least ten times a day for a new cat. She has checked Craigslist every single day for kittens. I even indulged her and we had a most illuminating outing to the cat shelter in town. Thankfully up until now the cats she has found have been VERY expensive...wild....or too far away. But today all that changed.

There were three little kids in front of Wal Mart standing by a basket with three little kittens in it...all white with varying shades of gray spots on them. Before I knew it I was asking how old they were and if they were boys or girls. The little kids did not know if they were boys or girls. They all spoke English but with a very heavy Russian accent. Their mom appeared from inside of Wal Mart while we were talking and she said she did not know if the kittens were boys or girls but she assured me you could just tell by looking at their faces which ones looked like boys and which ones looked like girls. I indulged her and just smiled as she very honestly and seriously explained  to me that the girl kittens had sweeter looking faces and voila that is how you knew. I was greatly amused by this method of determining the sex of a kitten that she was SO sure of. I did not want to burst her bubble with the "talk."

The minute I touched the kitten I knew it had fleas badly. But something kept driving me on asking questions and acting like I was getting one of these kittens. Tatiana chose one and she and I sheepishly looked at its private area right there in front of Wal Mart and Tatiana felt certain it was a girl. I asked the lady to hold it for us while we went into the store. We promptly abandoned everything we had come to Wal Mart for and bought kitten food and flea shampoo and headed back to procure the kitten. All the while I am in a daze wondering what on earth I am doing.

But on the way home I come up with a plan to have cat central be in the basement in the spot under the stairs in the play room. It is a big area. I can block it off easily. I need the cat litter box to be out of the way. This plan makes me feel a little better about the reality that I succumbed to pressure and once again have a cat in the house.

The absolute minute we walked in the house I headed straight to the sink in the kitchen and we gave the poor kitten a flea bath. I felt sick as I bathed it for half an hour..pulling at least 40 fleas off its teeny tiny body. I felt so sad for this kitten. I have given flea baths to kittens and cats before and I was surprised, this kitten did not make a peep and did not attempt to climb on top of my head or "get out of dodge." It took the whole process like a man....yeah, you read that right...the girl kitten is really a man confirmed it.

I told everyone in no uncertain terms that for all my troubles, misery and woe in my whole entire life I would get to name this kitten and I spent the afternoon mulling over Lord of The Rings names ....mixed in with some Hobbit names. Tatiana was rooting for Sam. And I was leaning towards Frodo. But then the big kids came home from work and Joe, my seventeen year old, without even hesitating, declares that the cats name is Benzo....WHAT? He tells us that in rap songs they often sing about riding down the street in their Benzo....AKA Mercedes Benz. I was emphatic. NO, we are not naming this cat Benzo. Pretty soon party lines were drawn and things were not looking good for the three of us against the name Benzo. By the time we finished a thirty minute car ride to the church with Joe to our Wednesday night activities he had swayed all three of us and Benzo it is. Say it lots of times and you will have to agree. It is a tad catchy.

I know you thought I hated cats and I do... but I don't. I hate when they scratch furniture. I hate their hair everywhere. I hate that good friends who are allergic to cats have to worry about coming to our house. I hate that they sometimes forget they have a litter box. And that is the short hate list :)  However, if you knew what was going on at the Baird house right now you would agree that getting the kitten was a good idea. The kids were thrilled beyond belief. It was so fun to see all of them sitting around in the basement laughing, exclaiming and watching the kitten. So you may judge me if you must I deserve it.

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