Apr 21, 2014

Go With The Flow

So I have this friend who, in a most loving way( I think :), recently mentioned to me the possibility of "going with the flow." My first thought was, oh dear, this person does not know me at all how sad is this. I think a few years ago telling me I could not go with the flow was a very fair and accurate statement to make but I know better now...I am different now....right? Right? It really got my mind going and I have now been trying to notice every day the moments when I go with the flow and the moments when I don't. Wondering about going with the flow and if it is the most desirable thing to be described as being able to do in the world or if it is not. Do we really highly value people who just go with the flow through everything? Is it an offense if someone says you should go with the flow more? Aren't we thrilled in movies when someone chooses to not go with the flow. How could we profess to love the movie Princess Bride and people who go with the flow in the same breath? I know there is the whole "as you wish thing" but honestly that whole movie is not about going with the flow.....right? It is about fighting for true love. How about blowing up the death star? No going with the flow there. I dare you to find a movie that is all peace, love and go with the flow....someone is always fighting for something.

Only Dead Fish Go With The Flow.
 You all know how I hate the phrase, "it is what it is." I can not decide where the phrase, "go with the flow" fits in on my hate scale. I can see where there are times that going with the flow is important and there are times where it is not. I went with the flow for twenty five years of a very tough marriage. I went with the flow way too long with a child that is self destructing before my eyes. I went with the flow leaving dishes on the counter just this week. I went with the flow and did not skip songs on my I-shuffle when I was exercising....yeah I just listened as they came, crazy me :) I went with the flow many years ago and I have a sock basket to prove it. See, I am so "go with the flow"... Yay me :)

Sigh, okay, I know I can not trick you all yes, it is a well known fact that I do tend to think there always has to be a way to make something work. It simply can not be what it is....we can fix this...we can make this work. I have been known to fight in a most embarrassing way for something. I have fought for friendships that I never recognized were hopeless. I do now but not after I really and most deeply embarrassed myself many times over :)

So is it good to be able to go with the flow? I think in an airport it is very important to be able to go with the flow because you have no control over what happens there so just be okay with it. I think in a long line at the checkout counter it is very important to be able to go with the flow just enjoy the opportunity to read how many calories are in the candy and read about the Kardashian's and Miley because there is nothing you can do about all the other people that happen to be buying groceries at the same exact time you are. I think in a traffic jam going with the flow is a most appreciated quality. When it comes to gardening I know without a doubt that you have to be able to go with the flow. You never know what bug, blight, animal, or disease, may appear and you have to just go with the flow. Some years will be awesome others not so much. I can and have gone with the flow in all of these situations....but if I figure out how not to I will totes let you know. Weather...yeah, you have to be able to go with the flow when it comes to weather. Last week it was 70 degrees one day and we woke up to two inches of snow the next. Natalie cried some very bitter tears about it but I appreciated the last blast of beautiful white and chose to go with the flow. And in Natalie's defense she is eleven. You also have to go with the flow when it comes to leaves and acorns they will always be falling and you will always be raking :)

I am not good at going with the flow when it comes to my hair. I have naturally curly hair and I fight it for all I am worth. No going with the flow with my hair happening here. I can not for the life of me seem to be able to go with the flow when it comes to whichever cat we own at the moment. I finally recognize that the things that they do that drive me freaking crazy are very normal and expected cat behaviors but I still can not embrace them and go with the flow. If I really care about you it is very hard for me to go with the flow. My relationships have always meant the world to me and nothing gets my heart rate up faster than the thought of losing you....if I care about you. Are you sure you are gone? We can totally figure this out....come back. Yes, I am the same girl who just gave up on a marriage....does not make sense does it....? If I think I do not understand you or if you do not understand me I will never ever be found going with the flow. And if I am going over a waterfall I am going to try pretty darn hard to not go with the flow just in case you are wondering :)

It is awfully hard to figure out if there is an answer to this dilemma.And I do tend to be on team not go with the flow. But that said, I would propose that we, most likely, need both in our lives. How can we change or accomplish anything if we are always just going with the flow? I guess my problem is not that I do not go with the flow it is that I sometimes am not very good at knowing when to go with the flow. But hey we all can't be perfect :)

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