There is this feeling... I wonder if you know about it? It happens in your heart. It happens when you connect with someone. It happens when you remember something. It happens when you smell a smell. It happens when you hear something you have not heard in a long time. It can happen in a certain place. On a certain day. It is sight, sound, and sometimes even taste and touch all mixed together. Only you know when it happens. Only you feel it. No one else can really see it. You can try to explain it to others. But it is pretty hard to explain...I know because I am trying to explain it right now....but I am pretty confident that others have felt it too. I think two or more people can have this feeling at the same time but I wonder if that is rare? Maybe that is what causes a standing ovation? I am pretty sure it is a combination of peace, swelling, wistfulness, sometimes a small ache, a smile, a tear and almost a welling all mixed together.....oh and throw in some longing.
I feel it when I watch certain movies with the perfect blend of characters and views and music. I feel it when I accomplish something I thought I could not. I feel it when the lines meet and match. I have felt it when I show my kids something amazing. I feel it when I say the Pledge of Allegiance and then hear the Star Spangled banner. I have felt it when I have had a realization. Fireworks. Riding in the car with the perfect song playing on the perfect road. Making someone happy. Giving someone something they did not know you knew they wanted or liked but it shows them that without a doubt you noticed them. Receiving something from someone that shows they noticed you. Watching two people laugh over a shared memory. Celebrating a hard worked for accomplishment. Sun shining through clouds.
The feeling often results in tears for me. I do not know about you. I wish I could capture this feeling. It is so elusive. You can not seem to predict when it will come. It does not stay long. I know because....gulp.... I have tried to hold still when I feel it and trick it to stay but it never does. It moves on. It makes me long. Do you know what longing is? Yeah, a strong, persistent desire or craving especially for something unattainable or distant. What about swelling? Swelling means to affect with strong, expansive emotion. Expansive emotion. I love thinking about that word expansive put together with the word emotion.
So what has brought all this weird musing up? Well I watched the movie The Hundred Foot Journey the other night. It was a magical movie. The deliberateness and thoughtfulness of the words. The development of the characters. The visual feast. I wanted to open a restaurant, live in the country, savor food, cook....oh, okay and fall in love....why not live large :) It was a beautiful movie and I have no idea why it made my heart swell. If I had to guess I think I would say that it was the simpleness of the life in the movie mixed with the complex-ness of the humans that were in the simple life. Regardless of what it was I realized I have not felt that feeling in a long time. It is a simple yet very profound feeling. I cried and cried after the movie was over and could not for the life of me figure out why.
Oprah Winfrey and Steven Speilberg produced the movie and it did pretty well at the box office when it was released in August. I vaguely remembered hearing about it but not really knowing what it was about. But I am so glad this little gem spoke to me when I was staring at that darn Redbox screen wondering if there was anything rated PG that I could watch that did not involve animation :)
The bummer will always be that the movie may not feel the same to you when you watch it as it did to me......but it will not hurt you to try.....just saying :) It is possible that this feeling may have been only for me. Which makes me SO sad because I seem to have some silly notion that there is some way to share feelings. Would it not be cool if when you felt this heart, swelling awesome feeling you could choose just one person to share it with....like a Vulcan mind meld :) But just one person.....there has to be rules :)