Okay so no one laugh and no one judge me but I decided that on January 1st I would subscribe to a dating website. Are you done laughing? :)
Let's be clear, not a marriage website. A dating, making friends website. I have a job. I have kids. I have a church calling. I have family. I have friends in other states but I have nothing in the dating/friendships with boys part of my life. And a girl needs balance, right? Do not worry about me I will not get married again for awhile. And when the time comes I will definitely want all of you to approve the choice and have your say :) HA HA
I recently received some encouragement and some perspective on what these dating sites are about and it gave me a bit of courage. So I spent way too much time yesterday setting up an account on LDS Mingle. This is a site for Mormons looking for other Mormons. My religion is a huge part of who I am I can not deny it. I have seriously considered the possibility of having a relationship with someone who was not a member of my church and if they really loved me and we had a great relationship I have to confess I might be in. But I have no one in that category right now.
The first thing they ask you to do is pick a username. AAARRRGGGHHH. This is the name that everyone on the website knows you as. It is important. (or so I thought) I debated long and hard about this username. Does that surprise anyone? I thought about what would get someones attention? I thought what would represent me? Overthinker68? Yeah, someone would surely want to date that :) I could not for the life of me think of what represented me....schoolbusdriver46? Oh wait how about size2shoe? Or washescolorsandwhitestogether86? Yeah, this was hard. So finally I just decided I had to stop and choose something and so...are you ready? My username is...chocolateandpeanutbutter. Maybe, just maybe, I can find someone who loves Reeses as much as I do :)Yeah, if there is anything wrong with that username now is probably not a good time to tell me. Wait a few weeks :) Now that I have actually been on the site and seen what men choose for their usernames I am realizing it did not matter. I am having the most giggles I have had in a long time checking out these usernames....iamforyou.....youandmeforever23....celticgod. Yeah, good times.
After the username then you have to start answering questions about yourself and telling about yourself. It was incredibly exhausting. I have never thought so hard about what I like and what I do not like. How do you tell someone about yourself? I am a wordy girl and you all know this. My introduction was enormous.
And then after you tell about yourself you have to...gasp...tell what you want in a person. Yes, I almost gave up. But I knew this was good for me. And honestly there are not many opportunities to meet Mormon, single, normal-ish guys where I live, in small town Cottage Grove, Oregon so I knew this was important. So I powered on.
I had to tell what I would do if I had ten million dollars. I had to list three areas I have for growth....I wrote putting the lid on the toothpaste....folding socks and ironing. Honestly, I am perfect otherwise :)
Part of the process is taking a personality test. And my children and my mother had to be there for that process. It was thirty questions that required you to think back to the kind of child you were and answer with that in mind. SO HARD. But I tend to stress out if there is not an answer that fits perfectly. I quickly let go of that notion. And just went with my gut. And watched my mother inwardly smile as I realized what sort of child I was :)
When it was all done I was neatly put in the color yellow category. It alarmingly described me perfectly. And I quote,
"I am motivated by fun. I am inviting and embrace life as a party which I am hosting. I can be extremely sociable and persuasive." Yeah, note the word extremely. I should probably have a warning sign walking around before me :)
"I seek instant gratification." WHAT? Take that back this instant :)
Here is the hard part. "Yellows need to be adored and praised." Fine. It is so true.
The list of traits included "carefree, trusting, forgiving, charismatic, enthusiastic, hopeful, playful." Yeah, you get the idea. Let's go to Disneyland now, shall we?
I loved filling in the spot about how tall I was. And choosing which height of guys I was interested in. The choices went all the way up to 7'6" and I debated long and hard about that :)
Uploading pictures to the site was all sorts of drama. But I am so proud of myself I figured it out all by myself. I do not know what it all meant but I did it. It included all my dear friends:
but I did it. Now I am in my, impatient, instant gratification, sort of way waiting for the super powers at the website to approve my pictures and upload them onto my site. The word on the street is these boys need to see a picture of you before they decide if you are worth it :)
My Natalie and I sat on the couch last night and scrolled through page after page of men ages 36-51 last night. It was overwhelming. I have no idea what to do. And this is not the way I really want to do this. But I am going to hang in there for six months and hopefully find some friends who like chocolate and peanut butter :)